The Not-So Cinderella Story: The Marriage of Prince William and Kate Middleton

So, yes as I'm sure everyone would be aware of Prince William and Kate Middleton were married today, apparently witnessed by 2 billion worldwide, and of course, cost altogether £20 million. Yay! Hooray! We have a new Duke and Duchess of Cambridge! Isn't that great!? Yeah, you might've guesssed I don't really care if those two are married. One, Prince William is not the first in line to throne, anyway. Two, I don't really care that much for the concept of marriage, and finally Three: they're not really going to do anything for me personally. However, I did spend  time travelling across London to Westminster just for the heck of it. But what do I see but Union Jacks everywhere? It. Was. Ridiculous. However, Central London did seem incredibly fun. Wish I had my vid cam at the time. Although allow me to get a few things straight:

1: Barack Obama (or whatever world leader you were griping about) wasn't invited because the marriage of Prince William and Catherine Middleton is NOT a state wedding (and yet, we blew £20 million over it), so it only allows for the leaders of countries of the Commonwealth to come.

2. It isn't really a "Cinderella wedding story" as people like to paint it as. Well, I guess it is if you saw it as "royal marries non-noble". Yes, Kate Middleton is not an aristocrat. But she is most definitely "nouveau-riche". Her parents own Party Pieces, which has an estimated worth of £30 million. She in 2006, was also an accessory buyer for the clothing chain Jigsaw. She's about as far from a peasant as you can get. The fact of the matter is that she is the 11th generation of princesses, by marriage.

3. Americans, you outta piss off. No joke. You go out of your way to celebrate the 4th July (Independence Day) and gloat how much better you are than the rest of the world, especially the limey, crooked-teeth Brits. But when one of our sweet princes gets married, I hear some insipid talking head for the CBS declaring that the Americans have such profound interest because "We want what you have. We never had royals to look up to, and be proud". Tell me, then, what is the point of you celebrating Independence Day, then? A holiday where you gloat over sticking to George III of the United Kingdom, and when one of his descendants get married, you're all googly-eyed. Well, I'll tell you what, if it was up to me, I'd say: "You want the royals so badly? You can have them." Seriously, what are they there for anymore? The army?

Actually, I might take that back.

Kanye West Wins O Music Awards (Or MTV Is Retarded...)

So, it's that time of the month again. I get increasingly reluctant to do these posts, but a promise is a promise. So what tedious news surrounding my favourite rapper? Well, apparently Mr. West has won a music award that I've never heard before, nor have a flying fuck about called the O Music Awards. Apparently it's the only award ceremony in which he can't interrupt the acceptance speech...as he himself is the winner. Apparently Kanye West has received a nomination for "Best Tweets", an award that they apparently just made up. That's the thing about Twitter: you have to have to little to say, or mention something either briefly or of nominal importance to anyone to fit 140 characters in. It's not all that appealing to me. Probably need to use it more. However, if Kanye West of all people, out of all the artists in the music industry making hits this year, has something of the best tweets, then it says a lot about how interesting and/or insightful our internet-savvy musicians are. Which is to say "not very". Oh, that's right...He was the only nominee there wasn't he? Well, I for one, am proud of Kanye for winning an award that I never heard, much less gave a fuck of, and MTV made the right choice. I mean, who else than top tweets such as this:

And as for MTV, I'd never thought I'd see the day that you'd give awards for music stars on something that isn't music. But you've outdone yourselves haven't you? As you persist in this moronic celebuton nonsense, you might as well drop the "M" from your network. You have become E!-lite. You guys have stopped giving two shits about music whatsoever, and it has become nothing more than a commodity, which you merely make music awards out of tradition. You've stopped giving a fuck ages ago. And that's why you're network is garbage. I won't even ask you next time to actually give, Kanye, no, any music artist, an award beased on the music they produce, not stupid ass tweets, since you guys have ceased giving a fuck a long time ago.Readers, hold on your books tight because this will be a bumpy ride to the imminent Idiocracy!

Satya Sai Baba Can't Save Himself From Death

BTW, This is not me laughing at this man's death (he lived a rather full life after all, for want of a better word). This is me finally calling him out on his bullshit.


On every uncomfortable and pathetic Sunday that I accompany my family to get their "Jesus High", I often meet up with a group of Hindus with their own little shed to do their worshiping. They were pretty pleasant people, perhaps much moreso then the congregation. If anything, I only had one "flaw" of sorts with the group: They are Satya Sai Baba devotees.

Yesterday, on 24th April Satya Sai Baba passed away at the age of 84. So rather than talk at ridiculous length on the nonsense of typical holiday hijacking in the name of Jesus, by the world's biggest religion, I've finally around to talk about the man who claimed he was an avatar of Shiva and Shakti. Will I shed tears like I did in my previous post about the late Elisabeth Sladen? No. Do I have any nice things to say of him? Not really. Do I regret that I had not done this post sooner? Well, like most things in life, the answer is not straight-forward. If anything, Satya Sai Baba was proof that with enough charisma, you can persuade anyone that you can do anything or are far more unique than anybody on the planet. Even when it is blatantly, and obviously, not true. He was also proof that Westerners in the apparent disillusionment of the perceived authoritative qualities in Judo-Christian traditions, and newfound love of the Eastern religions, will mindlessly fall in love with a man purporting to be a gateway to spiritual enlightenment. Even when this man is 1. like every other siddhi that came and went and 2. is just as authoritarian as any pastor, priest, deacon etc. would be. And to bring my point home, he even for a short while managed to grab the attention of The Beatles, until they wisened up a bit.

So who is Satya Sai Baba? Born as Sathyanarayana Raju on the 23 November 1926, at the age of 13, he claimed to his parents that he suddenly realised that he was an avatar, specifically the Sai Baba of Shirdi reborn. This was an interesting choice since the Sai Baba of Shirdi was respected amongst Sufi Muslims and Advaita Vedanta Hindus alike, so you see basically where this is getting to. His mother claimed that he was an "immaculate conception" akin of Jesus Christ, another "god-man" that he would liken himself with. To properly respond to the alleged "immaculate conception" claim made by his mother, I have this brief clip on The Princess Bride that readers can watch:


He then would later lead an organisation which over the period of his life would grow to around 6 to 100 million. His doctrine claimed that there is no true path to God, so you can choose the religions of your choice and still follow him. It also had the occasional "Be nice to people, life is valuable, don't do any improper sexual actions, yada, yada, yada..." stuff that I hear ad nauseum, that somehow constitutes as proof that he's a good guy, and built dozens of schools and universities in his name. Of course by this reasoning, with the latter, I could argue that Josef Stalin is the greatest humanitarian ever and world leader for all time because his regime had universal healthcare, and 90% of the whole Soviet Union literate. How this would justify 20 million people dying under his regime, I have no idea.

A key part of Sai Baba's influence comes from his purported miracles, most commonly, the materialisation of vibuti, or holy ash, amongst other things like necklaces, watches, rings etc. One of my favourite ones is when he supposedly materialises  a small orb of gold from his mouth. The fact that people seem to honestly fall for his sleight-of-hand tricks makes it all the more sadder, especially when truly laughable excuses like, "His miracles are not a key part of his movement", or "You didn't provide sufficient evidence that he is not who he claims he is" or even, "science works in the realm of the physical, Sai Baba  deals with the supernatural" are put forward to his critics (The last one was a claim verbatim that Satya Sai Baba made himself). Even when the responses are 1. "Well his teachings don't seem to be either", 2. "Yes, we did. You're just so caught around the charisma of this man, and was legitimately convinced by his parlour tricks, that you'll deny any evidence to the contrary" and 3, "Well, explain his 'supernatural' abilities look extraordinarily similar to sleight-of-hand manoeuvrings? Is the boundary between the natural and the supernatural really that thin?"


At some point, an organisation in India known as the "Committee to Investigate Miracles and Other Verifiable Superstitions", headed by Hosur Narasimhaiah (or simply H. Narasimhaiah), Indian physicist, educator freedom fighter, translator (of Mohandas Gandhi's work), and rationalist; approached Sai Baba to verify whether he could really materialise holy ash and gold, and surprise, surprise; under scientific scrutiny, he simply ignored his request three times, and pretended that somehow, Narasimhaiah's methods were suspect. Seriously, what does a god-man, have to fear from a little scientific test, which would easily fall apart if said god-man really could materialise objects from nothing, make his face appear on the moon, and was really omnipotent? Oh, that's right...He wasn't one, was he?

There was also the child abuse allegations that were made against him. Now, I would normally put those allegations aside for a moment and deal with simply the propagation of superstition. However, these allegations are widespread. In fact, these is an entire website dedicated to claims from former devotees that Sai Baba sexually abused them. Why haven't any investigations towards those claims ever come into fruition? Ah well, no reason. Just the widespread political influence this man possessed shielding him from most of the legitimate criticism presented towards him. That same influence protected him when six people were killed in his bedroom in 1993, after an assassination attempt, from any investigation into the events that occurred.

If anything, the only people I feel sorry for, is his ever-so-gullible followers. The fact that this man claimed he would live up 96, will undoubtedly have no effect on their blind devotion whatsoever. Indeed, Sai Baba's death had initiated a four-day period of mourning, and received condolences from Indian President Manmohan Singh, and the Dalai Lama...all over a man who used magic tricks to get followers. His body is currently lying in state. This is a joke, if I ever came across one. It really shows the absurd lengths that India's elite will go to protect the image who was essentially a conman. There is only a few things that I take as a form of solace in this shoddy public wailing over the life of a charlatan. 1. One of his opponents, James Randi, outlived him. He even wrote an article about him giving his "goodbyes" to one of his greatest adversaries. And 2. Satya Sai Baba briefly before his death, finally accepted the merits of science. For all his miracles and teachings especially this goldmine, which I'll give the quote in full of his response to H. Narasimhaiah's request for scientific testing:

"Science must confine its inquiry only to things belonging to the human senses, while spiritualism transcends the senses. If you want to understand the nature of spiritual power you can do so only through the path of spirituality and not science. What science has been able to unravel is merely a fraction of the cosmic phenomena ..."

 ...He couldn't even live to fulfill what would be his greatest miracle, and change the world before his death. He needed the hard work and determination of the excellent doctors around him to keep him going as long as he did. So, if you're some spongehead who scoffs at the achievements that science has brought to us and even made our lives better, even for one such as Satya Sai Baba, and remarks on supposed deathbed conversions of the greatest scientists to have ever lived, as some sort of support for your B.S. beliefs, on supernaturalism or whatever, remember this well: When your sick and/or dying, or otherwise incapacitated, we all become rationalists in the hospital room. Try to resurrect yourself out of that one, God-man. And I'm not talking about Jesus.

Happy Easter.

R.I.P. Elisabeth Sladen AKA Sarah-Jane Smith

On the 19 April 2011, the actress Elisabeth Sladen, known for playing the companion of the Doctor, Sarah Jane Smith in Doctor Who, has passed away at the age of 63. Sladen spent her last months bravely battling the onset of cancer.
Now, I'm a huge fan of Doctor Who. And one of my favourite eras of the series was the Tom Baker years (1974-1983), otherwise known as the period of the Fourth Doctor. Much like the Rose Tyler  of the modern era of Doctor Who (Who Sarah later met in the Tenth Doctor Doctor Who episode "School Reunion"), while Sarah Jane Smith was known for standing besides Tom Baker for about two of his nine-year tenure, the character first appeared in in the Jon Pertwee years (1970-1974) or the Third Doctors time. It all started when she being the plucky young girl she was and snuck aboard the TARDIS of the Doctor as the time-travelling alien had to deal with the militaristic species called Sontarans. As John Pertwee left, Sladen continued to portray Sarah Jane Smith as Tom Baker succeeded the former.

Sladen with Jon Pertwee.

Even so, reportedly preferred her time with Jon Pertwee (not that Baker was awful, or anything, as she was one of the few members of cast he actually liked), and when she heard of Pertwee's death in 1996, she reportedly cried for weeks. It was there that she took part in what was arguably the greatest period in the entire Doctor Who series. My personal favourite was the "Pyramids of Mars", when the Doctor and Sarah faced up against the alien destroyer known as Set.

Sladen with Tom Baker as Sarah-Jane Smith and The (Fourth) Doctor.

The team-work between the time-travelling duo was so effective, you'd think that well, they're some sort of...duo or something. I mean, she wasn't exactly his equal (then again, which companion was the Doctor's equal?), but by the end of it, she came pretty damn close. Indeed, she became the template for future generations of companions. And when she returned with her own series, she became deliciously Doctor-like.

It is said by her co-workers that Liz brought much of her personality into Sarah-Jane. She was warm, receptive and encouraging to work with. Especially with the younger generation in the Whoniverse. This was especially the case of Tommy Knight Anjili Mohindra and Daniel Anthony (Luke Smith, Rani Chandra and Clyde Langer respectively). Even David Tennant, the actor who portrayed the Tenth Doctor, reportedly could barely contain his glee when he found out she would work alongside him in "School Reunion" (Tennant was only three when she first appeared on screen).

Other work involved appearing in various advertisements, in particular in a Letts Alice in Wonderland advertisement, starring Alexa in the radio drama The Stranger, and portraying a mermaid and Mrs. Darling in the Peter Pan pantomime.

If there's any solace in any of this, it is that she died at 63 years young. And if you don't fully understand what is meant by that, here's a picture:

Helen Mirren had nothing on her.

Sladen is survived her husband Dennis Miller, whom she married in 1968, and their daughter Sadie Miller.


"The universe has to move forward. Pain and loss are what define us, as much as happiness or love. Whether it's a world or a relationship. Everything has it's time, and everything ends." - Sarah-Jane Smith.

In Soviet Russia, Space Visits You!

Today, is the 50th year of Russia's Cosmonauts Day or Yuri's Night, internationally. After all, it is 50 years since the first ever human to enter space. In effect, validating that humans need not be confined to the pale blue dot floating in space, but they can potentially fly out into the cosmic oceans themselves to explore. When I was a kid, I was really enamored with space travel and astronauts. If anything, I was more in the U.S. Apollo program during the space race in the Cold War. Still, I couldn't help but admire the human achievement of actually being the first person to enter space. Sure, it was born out of some petty rivalry between the Soviet Union and the U.S., between who's got the best defence: military and technological advancements. But so long as it potentially helps humanity at large, that's good enough for me. So, who exactly was Yuri Gagarin? I mean, really?

Yuri Alekseyich Gargarin was born on 9 March 1934 to Alexey Ivanovich Gargarin and Anna Timofeyna Gargarina. While his mother was a voracious reader, his father was a carpenter. And the family spent time working in one of hundreds of the collective farms in the Soviet Union. When World War II came about, like millions of Soviet citizens,

Glenn Beck: So Long And Thanks For The Lulz

Yesterday on April 6th, it announced that Fox News' favourite hysterical media raver: Glenn Beck announced he was leaving the network. At least for me and several others, this is a shame. You see I was actually planning to do several posts on his moronic outbursts watched by millions of Americans. And there would always be one comment that riles people off. The man, for want of a better term, was an ideological crackpot. And his role in Fox News seemed to be no different than to provide a 21st century right-wing spin on the insane news reporter on Network. So, as much my sole post on Glenn Beck before didn't even have me actually addressing his stupidity, but someone else. It upsets me even more because I was so caught up with other work I pretty much missed his retarded claim on atheists a few weeks back. Oh, how I wished I started this blog when he went after Malia Obama, apparently referring to her as "ghetto trash": An act of hypocrisy at the very least since during Bush's presidency, he said that his daughters are off-limits. It is this story that should've kicked off my blog. Not some musician whose awareness of the world isn't expected to be significantly high so long as he sell records. In any case, all that's really happened is that he's leaving his own show. He still has the syndicated radio talkshow where he can deliver similar rants. So he's not actually gone.

Also, this entire affair beautifully demonstrates that even the Fox News Channel has limits. You see, the Fox News Corporation doesn't care that much about media accuracy, or even that matter about political views. Well, it does, but certainly not nearly enough. What it cares about is money. Shoot, it's speculated that Beck's own rhetoric isn't actually representative of his actual views, but in actuality part of the carefully constructed persona he built to draw ratings. Of course, I personally take that with a grain of salt, since he was pretty serious about his Mormonism, and spent the time on his show to present the "theory" that America was one of the places where the 12 tribes of Israel in the Bible went to, becoming the Native Americans and even suggesting that the pyramids were part of the Hebrew culture they took with them. Nevertheless, Beck's show at its height, achieved the highest ratings of any 5PM show around in 2009. Now, it has a third of its viewers from last year, which numbered 3.1 million in 2010. With Beck's increasingly ridiculous rants, the advertisers are leaving by the wayside. Apparently they don't want to me associated with a blowhard prone to crying fits over changes in America he doesn't like, and invoking Godwin's Law repeatedly to people he doesn't agree with, not to mention his tirades are beginning to sound like the right-wing militia groups that emerged in the 90s, and the survivalist sorts. Fox News needs advertising revenue, especially on prime-time and Beck isn't providing that, instead shilling to the gold companies. So they let him go. From prime-time, anyway.

Aw, Glenn,  please don't cry. America will survive without your mid-afternoon rants.

So what's new for Beck? well, I told you, he's still got the radio show. As for who'll replace him: Well, I would say I don't care, but considering the warnings Glenn Beck gave that he was only the calm before the storm, I'm actually a little concerned about who's next. So here's a clip I took hosten by some Fox News spongehead:




Also, I think it's again relevant to post this on the blog one more time as in the first Glenn Beck post:

Terry Jones: With Great Attention Came Great Irresponsibility

Oh, boy. Yet another religion post. Ah, well. Ever hear of Pastor Terry Jones? He is the pastor of a church known as the World Dove Outreach Center in based in Florida.

Terry Jones: The only awesome thing about seeing him on TV, is looking at his moustache.

I actually first became aware of his antics through YouTube when I watched a video by the atheist vlogger known as ""xxxThePeachxxx" posted a video on the Qur'an and book burning. It was then I was informed of this man and his organisation, and his intentions to burn the Qur'an on September 11, 2010: the 9th anniversary of the 9/11 terror attacks on the World Trade Center, since according to Jones, the book had inspired the terrorist attacks. At this point, I wasn't much of a vlogger myself but if I was, I would've pointed out on YouTube that by his own reasoning, the religious book he uses: the Bible, isn't entirely clean from people doing horrible shit to fellow human beings with this particular holy book being used as inspiration for them:

Now, xxxThePeachxxx's video suggested that as backwards and obsolete of modern-day society as the Qur'an is, burning it is at best, an infantile approach to show your disdain for a book, and at worst purging our collective civilization of manuscripts of ideas and beliefs we once had, for generations to come. During the so-called "Ground Zero Mosque" media frenzy in the United States (which wasn't a mosque, nor was it even near Ground Zero of the WTC), I noticed that widespread global media attention actually went to this man and his followers, and it seemed like he was seriously considering this. It was then that several US government officials, no less than Secretary of the State Hilary Clinton; General David Petraeus, the commander of the US forces in Afghanistan; and the commander-in-chief President of the United States Barack Obama himself specifically warning him that his actions could potentially threaten the lives of the soldiers abroad in Afghanistan and Iraq. It would've seemed Terry Jones didn't care and would rather uphold his constitutional right to burn the Qur'an if he so chose, just because; but then he supposedly received a call from the developers of Park51 (aka the "Ground Zero Mosque") informing him that they'll move the building elsewhere, and so he relented. Of course, no such promise was ever made to him, and when this was brought up, Jones tried to turn it into them breaking their fictitious promise. Still, he relented saying he'll move the date and that his point was made (He also received a lucrative Toyota deal if he didn't go through with it).

Turns out he was serious when he said he'll move the date elsewhere. This fucking moron on the 20 May 2011, held a mock trial for the Qur'an, in which he found it guilty of crimes against humanity (or something) and burnt it after dowsing it with kerosene. A member of his congregation filmed the whole trial and the video was uploaded onto the Internet. The world's media caught wind of his new attention-whoring antics and "somehow" that news became within Afghan President Hamid Karzai's reach, who then condemned the Qur'an burning. This news spread and a protest was held on April 1, 2011 in Mazar-i-Sharif, Afghanistan; which quickly turned violent with 12 people killed as a result: 5 of them Gurkhas and 3 UN staff members. Terry Jones being the amoral fuckwit he is, bears no responsibility for the protests.

Now this post is going to be my honest opinions on the entire thing. Also what I found is that I can put my thoughts properly when I write it down, so here it goes: Terry Jones, you sir, are an attention-seeking moron. Did you not consider that for one second if you were really as patriotic as you fancied yourself to being last September, then you would've taken heed of the warning of Gen. Petraeus and President Obama of the consequences of your actions? and how it would affect the situation abroad in Afghanistan and Iraq? But you didn't care. You just wanted your 15 minutes of fame, and put it at the expense of the lives of those operating in Afghanistan and Iraq. If this was your way of finding proof that there is a violent element to Islam that still exists in areas like Afghanistan, my response is: "No fucking shit, Sherlock!" The Taliban is still actually out there. Of course there's violent elements to Islam. It's a religion with a book written 1400 years ago.

Protesters: As much as I find this Terry Jones guy vile, I'm aware you for the most part don't know much about the United States and the Western world in general. And I understand that since you guys have dealt with warlords fighting each other, the Soviet Union invading your country, and being ruled by the Taliban who basically controlled your exposure to the Western society (which is to say they only showed the bad bits and exaggerated them). But one of these days, you must realise that not everyone in the world is going to respect the religion that is predominant in your nation. Not everyone will put the Qur'an on top of the shelf, and that in the West, there are a number of people that will not view your holy book as the source for all morality and even in many cases, find it ridiculous that people in this day and age still use it. In the same way that the accusation is often made that people in the West generalise all Muslims as terrorists because of the sort of media there, you also can't generalise as some homogeneous block where everyone shares the same sentiments. The reality is far from what is presented to you about the way of life experienced in the West and the freedoms you will experience there. Sure, we've been absolute dick things abroad, especially in your neighbourhood, but that still doesn't warrant you to go and kill people you identity to be foreigners, or look Wetsern, or associated with Westerns. All you're doing is legitimizing the Islamophobic sentiments that is becoming a problem in Western culture. If you want people to respect your beliefs, then try to do everything that is within your power, to stop reacting violently. Terry Jones does not give a flying fuck if you burn effigies of him. In fact, he's hoping that you do just that to prove his point. And do not listen to those religious cunts who claim to speak for you and uphold your religion. They are part of the problem, and a significant reason as to why your country can't experience the liberties they deserve. They are even worse than Terry Jones. They are the ones who will tell you to give up your son to them, so that he can fight for some vague, unachievable goal as part of some fictitious Jihad.

And finally, media: I sincerely hope you dickheads had your lulz out of this mustached cunt. Care to explain how someone like Terry Jones was able to get your attention in the first place? Because I sincerely doubt he's that charismatic. I mean, look at the size of his congregation. How an organisation of no more than 50 members, all of them almost as uneducated as an 8-year-old girl under the Taliban were able to get the world's media's attention is beyond me. And worse, before you ask Terry Jones if he feels responsible for the protests in Afghanistan, why don't you take a good look in the mirror and ask yourselves: On what slow day was this newsworthy? Should we pander to attention-whoring pricks like this man? Is it worth pestering government officials on this man's actions? Would these protesters even know about this man if you ignored his attempts to showcase his fundamentalist idiocy on the six-o-clock news? Well, guys it was funny while it lasted (well actually, it wasn't) until people got hurt. So that's my take on this whole sorry affair. Misanthropy is becoming a more promising position when you have: 1. An idiot who can't voice his objection to someone's beliefs without it feeding his own ego, and pyromania; 2. A group of people who get really upset over their shared favourite book being burned that they have to kill someone as compensation (although showing them other, better books that can inspire practical use from its information gained from it); And 3. The media morons thinking number 1. is more interesting enough to report time and time again, until something cool happens. Like 12 people being killed, 5 of them Gurkhas. Awesome(!) There's enough asshole to go around.

So, what have we learned? Burning books are not arguments against them. And if you want respect, stop behaving in a manner that makes it harder for you to get it. Act like your fucking species, please. That's all. See you soon.

UPDATE 06/04/2001: My position has somewhat changed. Pastor Terry Jones is an idiot. However, burning the Qur'an does not kill people. Overreacting to the burning the Qur'an with violence kills people. The media just does what it does and it was pretty inevitable that they'd report on him again after last September. Also, where does the blame go from there, to relations between the West and the Islamic world? No. It begins and ends with the guys who killed innocent people for whatever reason. The real problem is people who cannot behave even in a slightly reasonable manner when their favourite story book is burned. Even if they had a lack of education, I still suspect that the killing of these people wasn't an accident. Shoot, even the Dove World Outreach Center is uneducated, I still think burning a Qur'an harms any diplomatic measures that should be taken. And so the ones who killed those 13 people, are a bunch of cowardly butthurt assholes. What reason was there to react like that and kill those people, none of them are Terry Jones or related to him in any way? Why did you kill the ones who weren't Westerners? And if they should be found and arrested for their actions, what will their excuse to the police?: "I killed those people because someone across the world burnt the Qu'ran"? That's a pretty fucking pathetic reaction to a Qur'an burning, as infantile as it is. If any protesters there do not advocate the murder of these people, then they should distance from them. As I said before, do not allow yourselves to be swept up by cunts who care less about you and your rights than their dogma. They are the ones that have ultimately ruined your country, not the West (well, kinda). So stop overreacting over a book and take personal responsibility.

KW And KP Can't Do E.T.

So, it's the 28th again, and instead of discussing issues that I find more relevant to this blog, such as the Japan earthquake or my views on the foreign intervention on Libya, I am instead under a self-imposed obligation commenting on the exploits of the talented musician and arrogant, self-righteous manchild, Michael Jackson Kanye West. So what's new this month?: Well, some utterly boring shit related to more music video nonsense. As an update on last month: Turns out that Kanye does in fact care for other people than himself (and his late mother). That shoddy eye-sore of a video that was "All Of The Lights" was noted, adjusted and edited for the sake of the fans that are prone to photogenic seizures. I have to admit that this is very considerate of him since firstly, he recognizes the last 5-10 seconds of his video with flashing colours was downright inexcusable, and he avoids any potential subpoenas from some litigious cad presumably with an incurably awful taste in music (or is perhaps a more seizure-prone version of me). Anyways, he's teamed up with the likes of Katy Perry, who notably when she's not frolicking with Snoop Dogg in the dictatorship of Willy Wonka after taking the wrong to Albuquerque California, likes kissing girls. I know, shock horror, innit? Well, her parents apparently thought so (I get the feeling)...

(She also likes hanging around with Elmo...)




The duo made the song called "E.T." , which was not a homage to a wrinkly alien who can't make his way home nor Steven Spielberg. Now, I've heard the song and I thought, "Well, it's not that mediocre". To be honest, I hardly strive to expect much from pop musicians during this decade. This is probably the best song I've heard all year. That's a lie, by the way. This is the best song I've heard all year:



Anyways, the point is that while the song is out, Kanye and Katy Perry haven't finished working on the video and there was an incident where the video got uploaded onto YouTube before briefly taking it down. From what I can see Katy looks pretty alien (no pun intended, really):

For what's it's worth the lyrics are ridiculous. If Kanye really wanted to take the initiative and rap about how he's a manipulate hypersexual extraterrestrial, he should've dressed in drag and sampled one of the songs from The Rocky Horror Picture Show (Damn, I've just revealed the secret!)

Grow back an afro and Kanye could become the black Frank-n-Furter.

(The song Kanye should be sampling or have sampled already)



I'm sorry but some of the lyrics don't make any goddamn sense. An alien is not supernatural, by definition. Those would be ghosts. Or demons. Or genies. Or angels. Or even gods. Allow me to illustrate the difference here:

This is an alien.

This is a god.

This is an alien...AI...thing... (Although you wouldn't have guessed)

This is a...well...God...possibly (This is not looking good...)

He's an alien.

He's a god (Oh, dear...)

He is an alien...god...being...(F-F-Fuck it! I give up!)

Anyways, the point is, the lyrics are silly, but there ways to make a concept video that makes the song that much better. Like "Work It Out" was one of my least favourite songs in College Dropout album before I saw the video. Then it became that much better. I'll update it as soon as it comes out, but I'll say this: There are ways that you can make being an alien with a completely foreign sexuality if that's what your aiming for. Katy Perry to be fair is getting the idea from the looks of it. But looking like an alien who is weirdly sexy isn't enough, since I think that's what the song was going for. You have to adopt qualities that would make for a sexy alien. Like alien fetish fuel. In any case, what I have to say is to an extent, irrelevant since there is always those goddamn morons who are impressed easily by that sort of bullshit, as long as you put a shitty rave techno beat. I just thought that, maybe, just maybe, we can actually to be as creative and amazing as possible. Not this cheap concept laziness, followed by ass-kissing pseudo-reviews simply because you're an established star, and you like the stupid flashing lightings in the vid and you think the star wearing glasses is oh-so-cool.
 Anyways, I'll leave you with this video, as a parting note. Bye for now.




"Asshole!"
"Slut!"

UPDATE - 4.3.2011: I just watched the "E.T." video, and it's actually pretty good. It actually redeems the banality of the lyrics. It did everything I hoped it would do, if not more. Kathy Perry as an alien actually evolves into several stages which at least vaguely humanoid. Apart from the last one, which is very humanoid. As for Kanye: No comment (I say that because I'm tired of slagging him off)  Sorry, the update came late. Anyways here's the video:



See you soon.

Japan Earthquake: Scales Of Being Pissed the Fuck Off IN One Day

If you didn't already know, I was angry as I wrote this.

Nature. An impartial and harsh mistress to the affairs and suffering of humanity, who on occasion has very violent fits. It is this perspective of nature that is often avoided by the deeply religious when discussing "divine perfect creation". After all, after such events occur, our species found it to be more comforting to appeal to the invisible beings that is master of whatever natural phenomena occurs. The forefathers what came before us quickly realized that the world around us is a pretty hostile place: Stronger, tougher and faster animals than us, poisonous plants, fevers and diseases, not to mention the natural forces themselves. Faced with the hostility and apparent unpredictability of natural forces, which can be as brief as it is devastating, led our ancestors to assume that unseen magical forces; gods, are behind them. So we conjure up several gods to appeal to. For the sun gods: Ra, Krishna, Apollo, Surya were worshipped across different cultures; for the storms, Raijin, Zeus, Thor, Enlil, Indra, Shango, Set, Raijin,...Yahweh...and gods who create earthquakes, such as Poseidon and Yamazu. Over time, we began to understand these forces for what they are: natural processes, explained by chemistry and physics.

On March 11, 2011, Japan experienced its most powerful earthquake and the world's fourth most devastating, with a magnitude 8.9-9.0 on the Richter scale. In the actual earthquake, Japan did relatively fine for reasons I'll come on to, however, the real killer was the tsunami it brought towards Sendai. A waves between 4 metres and three stories would wipe out entire towns and villages. As of today, around 1,700 people are confirmed dead, with over 1,900 injured and 1,700 missing. with an estimate of casualties reaching tens of thousands. In addition to this, Sendai has around 11 nuclear power plants, six of which are, of have experienced failures. The Fukushima I nuclear reactor had experienced a partial meltdown after there was an explosion at the building, but the reactor itself was not damaged. A similar incident happened on reactor 3 of the plant. As for the Fukushima II Nuclear Power Plant, all four units were successfully shut down, amidst the earthquake. While it isn't expected to be another Chernobyl, the fears of a full meltdown led to the evacuation of 200,000 people. So yes, things are bad and very tense.

This Sunday has been a pretty crap one, if I say so myself. Not as the crap as those in Sendai, of course. But still pretty bad. Now I regularly watch the program, The Big Questions. There are occasions where it's really good, and those where is just a talking shop. In this week's episode, one of the topics of discussion was whether the Sendai earthquake brings into question a loving God. Since I've come across theodicies long before I did theodicy in religious studies class, my response upon hearing this subject, was this:

For me, it got a little bit worse. You see, there was an Islamic philosopher, Adam Deen claimed that the earthquake in Japan was, of all things, a test provided from the Invisible Almighty himself. Now, I've heard a lot of this stuff from Muslims in my religious studies class, school, Facebook perhaps more times than I heard it from Christians, and I still live in a fundamentalist Christian household (officially). Anyways, my point is: I don't understand why it is when faced a the problem of an omnipotent, omniscient deity, who is somehow able to relate with humanity to the point he is personal, and becomes involved with the physical world through "miracles", often in relatively moderate problems to solve, somehow wants to test millions of Japanese people by permitting a natural disaster to directly kill 1,700 people (as of Sunday 13th), and injure almost two thousands, while forcing hundreds of thousands out of their homes. Sure, you could argue that the survivors could have learned something really important about the human spirit. But then, does it really have to come at the consequence for someone's father, someone's mother, someone's grandparents or aunt's and uncle's, someone's children; who are if not directly killed by the earthquake and tsunami, are missing with no knowing of whether they are even alive or not?

We sit here and make pointless pontifications on the "morality" of an earthquake, when time would be better spent preparing for them, or investigating how they occur or if it already occurred, aiding the ones that have suffered. Surely, it's equally just as plausible that if an entity beyond the physical laws in which he can interfere every so often, isn't it equally plausible such an entity is not only not all-good, but actively malevolent? And personally gives out natural disasters to torture humanity, as it's more fun than outright killing all of them? Also, that such a being would only give out spurious relatively tiny "miracles" to pretend that it/he/she possesses a form of morality? So yes, That's the first form of being a bit cheesed off.

The next form of when I was, once again, pressured to accompany my family so that they can get their "Jesus High". I has hoping nothing stupid was said about the Japan earthquake during my uncomfortable stay. But I was to be disappointed. Turns out the Japan earthquake was predicted, yes, predicted...by the Bible. Funny thing is, Matthew 27:51 was mentioned, which says:

"And behold, the veil of the temple was rent in twain from the top to the bottom; and the earth did quake, and the rocks rent;"

And it continues on to 27:53 which says:

"And the graves were opened; and many bodies of the saints which slept arose; and came out of the graves after his resurrection, and went into went into the holy city, and appeared unto many".

And then, Hebrews 12:25-29:

"See that ye refuseth not that speaketh. For if they escaped not who refused him that spake on earth, much more shall not we escape, if we turn away from him that speaketh from heaven: Whose voice then shook the earth: but now he hath promised saying, Yet once more signifieth the removing of those things that are shaken, as of things that are made, that those things which cannot be shaken may remain, Wherefore we receiving a kingdom which cannot be moved, let us have grace, whereby we may serve God acceptably with reverence and godly fear: For our God is a consuming fire."
(They didn't read it in King James but, yeah.)

And, my response was this:

 

You see, I've actually written on them confusing natural geological activity for prophecies in the same book from people who really didn't have much foresight past the next generation or two. Such as the Icelandic volcano eruption and the resulting ash cloud to which they inconsiderately cite the um, Wrath of God™ for secularization or selfishness or whatever. So it's kinda part and parcel with these people. But this is where I really got cheesed off:

If you don't know, there's a group of jingoistic asshats who've ironically done a great disservice to their country by affecting how people perceive them. You see, these select few Americans thought it'd be okay to spout some nationalistic fervor and claim that the earthquake was just deserved. And this is when I got pissed off:

Apparently, the earthquake was some form of judgement or karmic payback for, of all things, Pearl Harbor. On Facebook:

The censorship was all me. They should be thanking me for protecting their worthless identities from (more) hate.

Yes. Because all Japanese people need to recompense for its Imperialistic outlook introduced by a man who's been dead for over twenty years, publicly apologised, renounced his status as a descendant of Amaterasu (kinda), and had his country under occupation by the Allied forces for over seven years. There's also this little tidbit they'd seem to have forgotten after Pearl Harbor happened, for (*cough*) "karmic retribution":

Yeah. I'd have thought people remember that little incident in their history books. And learned how 80,000 people were killed when the Fat Man detonated at Nagasaki. Perhaps remembering this can put a bit more perspective to those jingoistic nimrods. But never mind me. Here's a reaction to such bullshit from Christian user on YouTube that funnily enough, I actually have time for (And by Christian, this extends into the morality sense. And no, I'm not being sarcastic). Maybe I should be careful about these posts, since I often need to remember that not all religious people are jerks disconnected with reality. So here's her reaction to the donuts who think the earthquake in Japan is "karmic retribution":

So allow me to you guys in: We now know how earthquakes occur. They occur from the build-up of tectonic activity on the two opposing plates, with a sudden release of energy. In this case, the event of one ocean plate being pushed under a plate of land mass, or subduction. As the island of Japan is near the subduction zone, it will receive several earthquakes, and issue out warnings when seismic activity is detected. It is not completely unexpected outside magic books like these...prophecy jerks like to insist, neither is a test, or "karmic retribution". It is a natural event. Granted, it's the most powerful earthquake Japan has ever experienced, but it's a natural event nonetheless. That's all. All we need to do is show our support to the organisations offering to them. Thanks for reading.

Kanye West: Abortion and Seizures

Kanye West Edition #4. And not a moment too soon.

Recently (as in 25th of February), As promised for the New Year, I started following Kanye West on Twitter. I have to admit that I'm relatively ignorant about how Twitter works and also what my first tweet should be about. But I do have to say that having a Twitter account, and what's more following Kanye West is one of the best decisions I've made online this week. And for that, I'd like to thank Kanye for reminding me why I make these posts on him every month. Nothing do with him doing something personal to me, or really that I have a bone to pick with him. It's simply for the lulz. And Kanye reminded me that he is truly lulzy. And I think Twitter is good for him too. I've especially noted that it's one of the few internet tools where he doesn't write in ALL CAPS. Throughout the weekend I've been observing the...um, rather unique and rare insight into social affairs and the world at large that Kanye demonstrates when he's not making a rap song. For instance, he has rather interesting views on abortion, and seems to be on the same side as a certain Justin Bieber (and his mother). Although his, um, reasoning for this seems to be quite distinct from Bieber's, his mother's and even much of the pro-life movement in general. You see, Kanye West doesn't oppose abortion because he believes that a foetus has a right to life, nor because of God's as-of-yet unexplained plan for the world. He opposes it because he thinks it costs (people like) him money:

(1st lesson about following Kanye West's twitter: Be sure to capture anything he says that are offensive, funny, stupid or all of the above. I learned this the hard way and now it's gone. So thanks to Buzzfeed!)

Uh...It's a bit hard to fully understand what Kanye is saying here. Either that, or he legitimately thinks that there are some women who sleep with wealthy people just so they can take his money and use it for an abortion. Not only this, but he seems to imply that the abortion ridiculously expensive before that's the sole reason why these "gold diggers" will use the money for,...and not much else. Seriously, what on earth is this guy on!?

OK, so Kanye tries to clarify his earlier tweet with this to help those who are confused what he's on about:

OK, so this abortion thing isn't about him but someone he knows. A shame that this explains pretty much nothing.

In any case, for these posts Kanye's been receiving a lot of flak across twitter, most notable of which by Lily Allen. Lily, who's had the misfortune of receiving two miscarriages in the same year, really took Kanye's comments to heart. "Never has a tweet put me in such a bad mood. This is wrong on so many levels." Of course, as you might expect, I agree with Lily Allen, and I completely sympathise with her. Although, while a lot of people are royally pissed off at what "Yeezy" has to say this time, I've since long gone past that, and instead find it to be so insensitive stupid it's funny, if not that, then just confusing.

Nevertheless, I fell I should help Kanye, or rather "the people he knows" out on this abortion thing, because they seem to be little confused. Now I may not fully understand how people do things in America, but I do know how to look for sources on the Internet. A simple Google search like this:

...came up with 8,420,000 results. Now from one of the sources I used, I discovered that in between 6 to weeks of gestation, a woman can expect to pay is $350 at an abortion clinic or $500 at a physician's office. At around 16 weeks, the cost rises to $650 at a clinic and $700 at a physician's office, and at around 20 weeks, the cost rises to $1,000. Also, this source reveals to me that forty-two percent of women who have abortions have incomes less than 100% of the federal poverty level (that's $10,830 for a single woman with no children) and 27% of women have incomes within 100% to 199% of the federal poverty level. So Kanye and the anonymous (likely made up) person he knows need not worry about the cost of an abortion for a woman he, or that guy he knows, was involved with. I mean Kanye is a millionaire, so $350, shoot, even $1,000 is pocket change for him. Whoever told Kanye that an abortion costs "50G's" was clearly bullshitting must have been counting on him being a fucking idiot. In fact, I haven't found anything about an abortion costing $50,000, and all sources simply lead up to Kanye's own stupendous ignorance of the cost of an abortion. Or maybe I'm wrong and I didn't account for the possibility that Kanye and "the person he knows" does not live in America and actually lives in a location known only as "Ballin' Nigga's World", where abortions cost anywhere between $50,000 and maybe $100,000, and the only reason why a woman wants to get with a "ballin' nigga" is to spend his money...on an abortion.

If that's the case, then I have a suggestion for Kanye: In order to avoid the injustice of having to spend "50G's" at minimum on an abortion in "Ballin' Nigga's World", you can return to the United States of America, located on Planet Earth, where you can spend at least $350 to the woman "the person he knows" had a relationship with to get an abortion. Also, the possibility of getting condoms which aren't absurdly expensive, if the abortion cost on "Ballin' Nigga's World" is anything to go by. The choice is yours.

"Looks like Kanye's coming home, guys!"

Now speaking of mind-numbing nonsense, I'd like to relate a small story to you readers: 12 years ago, I owned the Guinness Book of World Records 1999. Back then, I was a fan of Pokemon like most kids, but then I learned in the Book of World Records that the anime I liked was responsible for having more children admitted to the hospital than any other programming thus far. The episode "Dennō Senshi Porygon", commonly translated as "Electric Soldier Porygon", featured the protagonists Ash, Misty and Brock in cyberspace battling the criminal organization Team Rocket. To fight off an anti-virus program, Ash (inconsiderate of the children watching his how) orders Pikachu to use "Thunderbolt" on the anti-virus missiles coming their way, creating an explosion, complete with flashes of red and blue lights. The result was that the Japanese Fire Defense Agency reported that 685 children, 315 boys and 375 girls, were taken to the hospital by ambulance with seizures. While most of them recovered during the ambulance trip, 150 of them were admitted to the hospital with two hospitalized for two weeks. A fraction of the 685 children treated were diagnosed with photosensitive epilepsy. It was then I learned that the things that I enjoy watching can potentially give you harm, and then it becomes a question of whether there are things so cool that they are worth getting a seizure over. 12 years later, I'm confident in saying that if it exists, then the video to Kanye West's "All of the Lights" is not one of them.


Now, Kanye West has made some decent, if not, brilliant tracks even since I've stopped describing myself as a fan of his. Shoot, he's made some decent if not brilliant tracks in his latest album My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy. Tracks like "Power", "Runaway", "Lost in the World" are great. I might even tolerate "Monster". But "All of the Lights" is, at least to me, meh. Sorry. It's not all that. And I don't give a flying fuck if it had 14 artists on the track, squeezed into a 4-minute song. If you can barely notice well over half of them, then there's no fucking point, is there? No. So, usually brilliant video producer Hype Williams made a video to the single, managing to make it even worse. The video is an eye-searing, epilectic-inducing, ego-tripping piece-of-shit, and the only reason why if at any stage I found it likeable is apparently because Kanye and Williams had the decency to homage rip-off of the 2009 obscure French film Enter the Void.

Warning: The following videos may potentially onset an episode of seizures. One maybe out of awesomeness, the other...not so much.




While it's great that West at least seems to like that film, it makes no sense whatsoever to rip-off that film to that song. It's like having a fish-and-cheese sandwich. If anything, I'm amazed that Williams, as in the guy who made many of the greatest hip-hop videos of all time, each of them worth the massive budget put into it, especially the Busta Rhymes video "What's it Gonna Be?" featuring Janet Jackson, made this awful video. Dude, What. The Fuck!?





More than anything, I'm interested as to what explanations those in my Facebook (soon to be Twitter), and even those arse-kissing music websites have as to why a video which has seizure-worthy strobe effects, gives a "fuck you" to decent editing, and needs 14 or so people to make a song about having an injunction placed on him preventing him from seeing his daughter, which pays "homage" to a film far too awesome to put on this song? It's practically smack for the eyeballs. I've heard people pretty much say that they like it because of something along the lines of "it's a collab and-a-half". Yeah, and if Kanye had the bright idea to see if it's possible to put 76 separate artists on it, I'll probably hear from the same people practically masturbating to the supposed awesomeness the track would bring, as he magically managed to squeeze it into 7 minutes. "Awesomesauce!"...Yeah.


So until next time readers. Oh, another thing: If there's one thing I want to commend Kanye West for, it's his masterful gambit to try and get his own album banned for the album cover. In doing so would only provide more attention for himself, and create more publicity. And we all know that Kanye is practically the Galactus of attention-whoring. Thanks for reading. In this instance, even this, and especially not the video can save him from that twitter bullshit. Kanye, you're...fun. But please, come back to Earth and stay there this time, please? Thank you.

An Apology Of Sorts...

Last week, my laptop was finally fixed. It's been a lengthy and frustrating month, until this happened and from then I had to do my blogging from other computers, and the result was fairly predictable. There were a few times that the posts were incomplete. As bizarre as this sounds I sort of of keep a mental timeline on when to publish posts up, so occassionally what would happen is that some are posted before I actually complete them.

Turns out the laptop neither had a problem with its memory of CPU. There was a lot of dust stuck inside the heat-sink, leading it to heat up and shut down whenever it got too hot. This...nuisance was later handled literally last week, and it's fine again. Since then, I realised that almost none of the writings that I announced I would do have been done yet. Most of which can be attributed to the highly inconvenient laptop fiasco, others simply can't and worse, I wanted to write on other stuff as well. Some of which only came to me recently. So, a slightly updated to-do list is in order:

Everything on the Happy New Year's Day article will be done this year as promised. Then there are also a few more nuggets to do:

The Arab protests of 2011
Scintific inquiry and ethics
The case for skepticism

And that's about it. So readers, I'm sorry for it took so long, and things will get better from now on.

Justin Bieber Has A Movie

Just writing this pisses me off so much, I hoped it'd be shorter than the Kanye West articles .

Two months ago, I wrote the article: Fred Has A Movie; expressing my bewilderment that someone as obnoxious and unenjoyable as the character of Fred was on YouTube, and suggested that several other popular YouTubers warrant a movie before Fred does. Today, I realised to have shot myself in the foot with this one and take back what I said. Yes, that's right: Grammy-nominated, 2010 American Music Award Artist of the Year and 7th most popular woman on the planet: kidrahul, better known outside of YouTube to the world as Justin Bieber, has a movie. The movie is a documentary called Never Say Never, detailing his rise to success by some fluke of a music executive discovering him performing on the tubes, home vids, and of his of-so-fantastic World Tour 2010. Now, as you possibly might expect, this post, like the Fred one before it, is going to less about about the fact that Justin Bieber has a movie, and more about almost everything else. Apart from one thing...

To be honest, I've tried really hard to not dislike the guy. Even settling for indifference altogether. I mean, I at least "dislike" a certain rapper for all the dumb shit he says and much of the post-2007 music he did. He gets his monthly share, anyway. But in the end, I ended up being annoyed by Bieber. Not because of his music, but because he's either a moron or an arsehole. Specifically for many of his views and actions; some of which relate to :(*sigh*, not again...) religion. Perhaps I should give you a clue of what I mean:

Now technically, this one doesn't actually from Bieber himself, but his mother. After reading the Guardian (or G2) column Lost in Showbiz; a delightfully, wise-assed, snarky column that gives mine a run for its money, written by Alexis Petridis (Alexis is male, BTW. He's Greek), I learned that his mother apparently believed that Bieber was sent by God "to bring light to the world". Granted, she didn't actually specify how Bieber would do this, and that sounds like something mothers say. But if we can assume that coughing tepid R&B tunes, then I feel confident in saying that he doesn't quite compare to the likes of Moses,  David, Solomon...you know, those guys, let alone, what was his name...oh yes, Jesus. But what do I know? I'm just a snarky, heathenous blogger making posts about things he declares to be bullshit. I mean, for all I know, Justin Bieber could become a special UN envoy or an ambassador of sorts, and bring peace in the Middle East through his music; with Israelis and Palestinians alike agreeing that the one thing they can agree on is that they love Justin Bieber (or perhaps hate as the case may be. After all, it wasn't specified if his music has to be liked to unite them).

Perhaps to strengthen his mother's case, there was a few months the massive flooding of the east coast of Australia. Bieber in response to the suffering experienced by thousands of victims, sent his prayers for them. A nice gesture. Although personally, I'd have thought a more direct response would be sending, you know, money. But then, given what his mother said of him, it's also possible that Bieber being the light of the world had his prayers answered, and God decided to alleviate the suffering experienced 35 dead lives and 9 missing later.

And then, there are these little nuggets on what he does when sufficiently peeved. Q: What do you do when some arsehole hacks into your Twitter account keeps prank-calling you? A: Well, if you're Justin Bieber, you get his phone number, post it on Twitter and encourage your 4 million followers, many of them rabid fans of his, dubbed "Beliebers", to call the phone number. Nice. Thing is, that sort of thing would get him banned from Twitter. Unless your name is Justin Bieber.

Look at how devilishly sweet he is...

There's also the bit when he chucked a water balloon at a police officer, and got away with it. Thanks to his bodyguard...or possibly God came through on that one as well. (Although this example is funny)

Now for Bieber's "astounding" insight into serious issues and the world around him:


On abortion: "I don't believe in abortion. It's like killing a baby."

...except it's not actually killing a baby. It's killing a potential human being i.e. "not-born-yet non-person". Now this might be a rather cold distinction, and I know the abortion debate is a little more complex than this, but I should note that well over 50% of fertilized eggs are discarded before they implant and 25% of pregnancies result in miscarriage. So if we followed specifically Bieber's pro-life reasoning, around 50%-75% of "unborn babies" die under God's watch. Just saying.

On abortion even in the case of rape: "Well, I think that's sad, but everything happens for a reason."

Wow. I'm just glad no-one asked him about in the case of life-threatening pregnancies, specifically ectopic pregnancies.

On politics & international relations: "I'm not sure about political parties, but whatever they have in North Korea, that's bad."

Yes, um, that's...bad. (Good Lady Haruhi! Hasn't he even at least watched Team America!?)
r wasn't reall
Now, some of you might be saying "You're too harsh of him! He's only 16!". To that, I answer there's some of things I realised when I was 16:

At 16, I wished I was allowed to vote for about two years. I thought Tony Blair was a lying sod, and David Cameron was no better. I was a bit curious as to how Menzies Campbell could maintain the policy of removing or at least a reduction of pension plans. I also witnessed Tony Blair step down as Prime Minister and the leader of the Labour Party, who was then succeeded by Gordon Brown...who David Cameron later succeeded as Prime Minister, three years later.

At 16, I was already aware enough of the principles of socialism enough to know that the Labour Party wasn't really socialist, and had an least basic understanding of what Marxism actually was (and for American readers, it is NOT Barack Obama's policies), the different varieties of Marxism, specifically Trotskyism, Marxism-Leninism, Stalinism (the last two are almost interchangable), Luxemburgism etc. and was able to identify that North Korea follows the Juche system: a poltical ideology/pseudo-religion based on Neo-Stalinist thought, developed by it's founder Kim il-Sung, and inherited by Kim Jong-il. I also knew they have a practice of shooting citizens that are literally trying to run across the border to Chin...in frosty cold pools, and prior to him becoming head-of-state kidnapped a South Korean film director and throw him in a gulag for seven years simply to make a propaganda film.

At 16, I thought abortion was a little more complex than killing a person inside the womb, whilst when I was 15, the only way I could accept it as necessary is when the woman's life is in danger, or raped.

And finally, at 16, I began to question this "God" character everyone talks about. But that's here nor there.

Granted, I never went out in search for fame, especially by the comic strips I did in my spare time, but that was  leaving aside the episodes of depression, I was content.

So what am I saying? Well, even excluding the latter which is pretty irrelevant, considering Bieber's ignorance of almost everything, I have to question the integrity of his marketing team, and how much they can squeeze out of him before he burns out.  And more importantly, before he notices anything. I mean, if they were able to convince him that somehow his life story so far, while impressive with Grammy nominee and American Artist of the Year and whatnot, warrants a self-promoting movie, who knows what gimmicky shit they'll pull off next with him. For all we know, his own cartoon or show (possibly reality TV) might be in the process of being made, and a possible comic-books, if they're silly.

"Hi there! True Beliebers!"

In any case, after they've extracted the marketing juice that Bieber gives off, when he does something ridiculous, he'll get dropped like a hot potato, and the adoring public aren't so pleasant anymore. (Shoot, half the public aren't pleasant to him already. Either they're just needlessly mean, or they've grown considerably sick and tired of the music industry's gimmicky pop-teen diabetic nonsense they churn out every two years) Or perhaps to give an example illustrating the cold and cynicism of the pop music/Hollywood market machine, let's look at the life of Britney Spears:

Her rise to stardom began when she joined the Mickey Mouse Club in the 90s, along with Christina Aguilera and Justin Timberlake. Out of those three, Timberlake seemed to be the one who did very well for himself. Not that Aguilera didn't escape well adjusted, but compared to Timberlake, well...


Anyways, Britney's first hit was "Baby One More Time" in 1999, at age 17, which topped the Billboard 100 List for two weeks, turned platinum and sold nearly half a million copies in the U.K., becoming the highest-selling single of the year and the 25th highest selling single of all time in Britain. And that's not even getting into the album of the same name. between her then four albums, Baby One More Time, Oops I Did It Again, Britney and in In The Zone, each of them with Spears delving further and further into her sexuality, she became one of the highest earning artists of the decade. After making hits after hits after hits, most of which in her early 20s. Then she randomly started marrying three guys at three separate times. Last of which was Kevin Federline, a dancer, who in his own ignorant, self-absorbed way, seemed like he was marrying his way into some stardom plan. Eventually after a messy break-up, Britney had a serious meltdown, following two cases she had to be admitted to the psychiatric ward and the incident when she decided that she could play an enraged Uncle Fester on the obnoxious pararazzi in the vehicle beside in the petrol station, and the cynical media that adored her so much turned against her.

And all of this happened, with this post written all before she turned 30. Although, she was lucky enough to bounce back. Partly because unlike Bieber, she actually writes her songs and decides which ones go in her albums and how they're executed, produces her own videos, and pretty much has reasonable creative control.

There's also the Lindsay Lohan example, but...I don't wanna get in that too much. The point is, Bieber is going to need a lot more staying power if he wants to stay on top. And being a naive little douche doesn't help. If I were him, I'd be either thinking of better songs to write that actually have an ounce of depth to them, or thinking about what would be a suitable investment plans. But if what I've shown is anything to go by, it's doubtful that Justin Bieber knows what an investment is. If anything, if all goes bust, Bieber's mother would probably blame everything on his manager, Scooter Braun, for being a typically manipulative, money-hungry Jew. As opposed to just possibly manipulative, and certainly money-focused. After all, she seemed to be initially dismayed when she found out that Braun was Jewish. Well, if all else fails, at least he can go back to making YouTube videos and playing hockey. Of course, at the possible risk to public safety, simply because of his music, he'd have to disguise himself from the world; preferably a disguise that inspires fear to those around him as he plays hockey:

So while I don't really care for music, perhaps a little media awareness would do the boy some good. Oh, and please, Bieber, please, please, please, please, I'll forgive you of everything that I find irritating about you if you'd just read a book. Thank you.

Valentine's Day

If you've noticed that I didn't write "Happy Valentine's Day", but simply Valentine's Day instead, then how observant of you. This is because I don't care about Valentine's Day. And with all honesty, I'm curious as to why a holiday that allows you to be special to your significant other only once a year, deserves such warrant. It's rather reminiscent of Jeremih's "Birthday Sex". It's supposed to sound awesome, but it's not. as Todd In The Shadows said: "The only reason why 'Birthday Sex' would be so special, is if you were so bad at sex for the rest of the year!". Likewise with St. Valentine's Day. Come on! Seriously, folks. What was wrong with all the other days to show special affection? The anniversary of your relationship: Marriage or otherwise? (To be fair that might've been on Valentine's Day for some people), Your partner's birthday? (Again, might be on Valentine's Day) Special night out for being so special? Next thing you know, there'll be some R&B jackass signing "Valentine's Day Sex", or something, as if that has any special awesomeness to it. And thousands of teenage girls and boys will buy it like every other superficial, regurgitated commercial pop-crap they can't get enough of. But since I'm on the topic, I might as well explain where the (alleged) origins of the holiday came from:

The Legend of St. Valentine

According to medieval legend, St. Valentine was a Christian under persecution and interrogated by Emperor Claudius II of Rome in person. Claudius II or Claudius Gothicus was infamous for his penchant for cruelty, having rumoured to knocking out the teeth of a horse with one punch, and knocking out the teeth of his opponent when they grabbed his balls in (real) wrestling.And that's terrible. So, a cruel bastard like him interrogating someone would probably look something like a Roman-style Jack Bauer interrogation moment, or even Captain Vidal from Pan's Labyrinth. Claudius II was apparently impressed with Saint Valentine and tried to get him to convert to the Roman faith. St. Valentine refused, and instead tried to convert Claudius II into Christianity. For this, St. Valentine was executed by being beaten to death  with clubs, but not before healing (supernaturally, of course) the blind daughter of his jailer. Variations include St. Valentine being beheaded instead, and the jailer's blind daughter being St. Valentine's love interest, writing the first "valentine" card himself to her from prison before his execution, which read, "From your Valentine". Although no evidence for any saint named Valentine or Valentinus and a love letter existed.

The First Valentine's Day...sorta.

The first association of Valentine's Day with romantic love was in 1382 in Geoffrey Chaucer who wrote:

For this was on seynt Volantynys day
Whan euery bryd comyth there to chese his make.

(For this was sent on Valentine's Day; When every bird comes to meet his mate.)

The poem that Chaucer wrote was meant to honour the marriage between King Richard II of England to Queen Anne of Bohemia. The treaty providing for a marriage was done on 2 May, 1381, with them marrying eight months later. They were both 15. In 1797, the Young Man's Valentine's Writer was published in Britain, in which several suggestions of sentimental verses for the young lover unable to form his own. Printers had already begun a limited series of cards with verses and sketches called "mechanical valentines", and as postal  rates got cheaper, more of these valentines could be produced and, better yet, able to be exchanged anonymously. And so, a holiday initially based on the myth of a sacrificial love of a victim of religious oppression became this commercialised cheap concept of love, in which companies and businesses make millions in profits selling flowers, chocolates, stuffed animals, cards, and other such crap under some pretense that true love is based on what you can buy them in mid-February. Pretty much like most Western holidays, actually:

Also, another interesting thing happened on the 14th February. No, not Salman Rushdie receiving his fatwa for writing the Satanic Verses (although that did happen). Ever hear of Al Capone?

A little conflict between his mob and the North Side Irish gang, led to five members of the latter, plus two non-members to be murdered within the garage of 2122 North Clark Street in the neighbourhood of Lincoln Park in Chicago. It is alleged that Al Capone ordered the hit on North Side gang members, and also that some of Capone's men and/or men that Capone hired from outside the city were responsible. Of course, "Stop Snitching" was already a burgeoning concept back then. When one of the dying men, Frank Gusenberg was asked who shot him, he replied "Nobody shot me"...even though he had 14 bullet wounds. So, if your significant other is into hip-hop, or quite fond of concepts and names being cheapened by commercialism, be sure to buy 50 Cent's Valentine's Day Massacre, for Valentine's Day. It'll be the most romantic thing ever.

"Oh, baby! This is the most romantic present ever!"

Have a great day, and try not to confuse any foreigner with the concept of "wuv".

(Sorry this took so long if you've already seen this,. Problems with the laptop)